Burning the Myths of Meditation

While I'm not the one in our home to turn on the news, I do try to stay fairly current, especially when the subjects covered align with my interests.

A few Sundays ago, CBS Sunday Morning was on in the living room while I was cleaning up the kitchen.  When I heard the next two stories that were coming up were two of my favorite topics – meditation and cats – I nearly ran into the room, green tea in hand.

The Cat Island Story was adorable and made my day, but I had a mixed reaction to the meditation portion of the program.

Part of me is absolutely thrilled that meditation is so mainstream that it’s highlighted on such a popular and long-standing show.

But part of me was saddened, because I know of few people who are able to stick to a twice-daily practice for any length of time, let alone 20 years like the man featured in the story.

In typical American news fashion, we were told how Allan Lokos had survived a fiery plane crash – literally engulfed in flames and told he had no chance to live.

“He says had he not been calm, ‘I would be pretty certain that I would have died in the plane. The person right behind me did,’ Lokos said.”

I’m awed, inspired and motivated by his story. He’s a true inspiration for us all. Not only did he make it through alive and recover more quickly than any doctor predicted, he was teaching meditation classes just four short months after the crash. How amazing is that?

Yet even though I only personally know one person with a twice-daily meditation practice, I know that those of us with a more casual meditation practice still experience innumerable benefits from better sleep, to learning to PAUSE before reacting, to simply being a kinder person.

Am I more likely to survive fires as a result of my almost daily meditation practice? Yes. The fires of life, that is. Meditation has helped me to weather through intense challenges in ways that I could never have before I began meditating. It works. It’s life changing. It can save your life – literally and figuratively.

But it doesn’t have to be done every single day, two times a day, for decades, in order for it to work.

That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t strive for that ideal – we should. But I worry that those who watch the CBS story will make up that meditation isn’t available to them, because their own dedication will never match that of Allan Lokos.

Enormous benefits can be realized with just ONE minute of meditation – or even five mindful breaths – once a day. It’s that easy. Start there and I bet that you will naturally begin to increase the time you devote.

Top 5 things you will NOT experience in my meditation workshops

1)   Receiving a mantra that you can not share and that you must keep using.

A mantra is a word or phrase that we repeat to focus the mind during meditation. It can also act as an affirmation for a concept or way of being we'd like to embrace. Some monks give secret mantras to yoga students, but I believe in each of us creating our own mantra that is uniquely ours. I also believe that mantras very often change, according to the circumstance.

2)   Describing HOW LONG my practice is, nor will I ask anyone else in the room to share how long theirs is.

Meditation is a personal practice (not perfect), and if you feel the need to compare or live up to what I do as an instructor, or anyone else in the room, then I have failed to teach that point.

3)   Calling myself a meditation expert.

Like you, I’m just doing the best I can to try to quiet my busy mind. While I have had yoga and meditation training, and have a practice (not perfect) of my own, I have aspirations to be even more dedicated.  I will always yearn to embrace stillness even more than I do today, and my guess is that we are all learning.  In the practice of meditation, I don't know any true "experts." As Ram Dass shares, "We're all just walking each other home."

4)   Giving you only one style of meditation to try.

In my early days as a yoga instructor, I had just one meditation technique to offer my clients – a twice a day, 20-minute practice. It’s no surprise that most of them failed, and that I couldn’t hang through it either.

Today I understand that there are many ways to experience stillness and mindfulness. I hope that one of the many ideas presented in the workshop will be a fit for you, and that you’ll notice your life changing as a result. (Mine has...)

5)   Claiming that meditation is the answer to all of life’s challenges.

It’s not. There are times when you should purposefully occupy your mind with things like light movies and fiction, because what you are going through is too scary to sit with.  This may be the death of a loved one, the sudden loss of a job, or an unexpected diagnosis. During challenging times like these, there are safe ways to practice mindfulness, and you'll learn these.

My goal for the workshop is simple - that you walk out with a solid understanding of the benefits of meditation and are inspired to create your own unique practice.  

Cardio Burns Calories, Yoga Creates Time

Most of us hold the illusion that there is not enough time, and the recommendation to get 30 minutes of exercise five times a week just adds to our pressure. Yet I’m troubled when someone says they don’t want to add a yoga class to their week because it won’t burn enough calories to be counted as exercise.

I understand this perspective all too well. For years I would only attend a yoga class that could burn significant calories and increase my heart rate, just like if I had been to the gym. Even now I sometimes slip into this mentality, like last month when I missed my cardio workout and tried to replace it with a very vigorous heated yoga class – so vigorous and so hot that I left class with a blister on my palm.

For the most part, today I view my yoga time as entirely separate from my workout time. It’s an addition to my body movement for the week; it’s time for my nervous system to receive a well-deserved pause. And when I give myself that pause, it’s amazing how much MORE time seems to appear in my schedule because I'm able to focus more and work more efficiently.

It reminds me of this Zen proverb:

“You should sit in meditation for twenty minutes every day — unless you’re too busy. Then you should sit for an hour.”

I wonder what would happen if we viewed our yoga practice as wholly separate from what we call exercise. What if we could give ourselves permission to spend at least one hour a week on gentle yoga movements that are not designed to burn calories, but to create more space in our heart, mind, joints and even our calendar?

Perhaps our 2016 intentions would be more easily realized with the addition of gentle yoga?

Om For the Holidays

“There’s no place like home for the holidays…”  

Robert S. Nevil & Matthew Gerrard

What does it really mean to be home for the holidays? Some people are not able to go home. For others, home stopped feeling like home years ago, or never did.

Home is the place where we should feel safe, unconditionally loved and at peace. However, our true home is not in any particular zip code, but in our bodies and our hearts. Our true home is our physical and spiritual self that we carry with us at all times.

Over the holidays you may begin to feel homesick for the familiarity of YOU. Yoga and meditation are the safest, easiest routes back home, in the form of deep breathing, meditation or a few simple yoga poses.

These tools will keep you grounded in yourself, and the commute time is literally seconds. There is no traffic. No rest stops needed along the way. And there is simply no way to get lost.

Just like Perry Como sang, “I’ll be home for Christmas,” whisper a soft promise to yourself that you’ll visit home at least once a day this holiday season. Give yourself the gift of presence.

PEACE -The Most Sought After Zip Code

 

It’s one of those immutable laws. Life will always contain geographic and/or internal changes. 

Relocation is inevitable.

When we’re in between the zip codes of life, it can be very unsettling – if we allow it to be.

So how can peace be packed into any relocation?

While in transition it feels like everything is changing, but the truth is -  the essence of who you are remains unchanged. There is comfort and reliability in things that remain the same, so why not reside in that familiar neighborhood while navigating transition?

Your life’s history, and the love you’ve given and received will forever remain unchanged. All the good you’ve poured into the world is sustained no matter what state (emotional or geographic) you are in.

Look to symbols in nature as a way to maintain peace during change. Waves flow in and out, at times with great force, other times quite gently. Standing on the shore, all we see is fluctuation and change, but the essence of the ocean remains the same. Getting in touch with that sameness within us can provide peace as we flow in and out of transition.

Last but not least, no matter what transition we’re experiencing, the breath passing through our bodies is an ever-present portal to peace. In any moment of change, a gentle deep breath will always lead to greater ease.

Equanimity During Relocation

We’re always in the midst of some kind of life change or relocation, whether it’s geographic or internal. Yet even though change is the one constant in life, we tend to fear, resist or deny it, even though it’s inevitable.

And when we’re not wishing change away, we’re busy evaluating it and labeling it as either “good” or “bad.”

What would it be like to cultivate a sense of equanimity, trust and comfort, no matter what the next destination might be?

Imagine embracing all of our relocations in life.

To achieve that paradigm shift, start by recognizing that change isn’t good or bad – it just is. It is exactly the way it’s supposed to be. Shed the dynamics of evaluating, over-thinking, or over-controlling; these only drain your energy.

If you can embrace that concept, what you’ll gain back is the time and energy spent over-thinking, over-analyzing, or over-evaluating. During change, we’re already stressed, tired and confused. Why add to that chaos?

Let go of your need for everything to be good, because when we are attached to something being a certain way, we’ll inevitably be disappointed. In the meantime, we may miss what life wanted to bring to us – perhaps an even better opportunity!

Life is fluid. We might as well get used to that. Being present to life, rather than labeling life, helps us to live more fully.