Separation Due to Relocation

When your spouse or life partner is living in another city for a period of time during your relocation, you find yourself saying farewell on a weekly basis. The first few times that happens can be particularly painful if you are not prepared. You may experience unexpected feelings of abandonment and loss.

It can be very helpful to take time to discuss the weekly departures with your spouse/partner so that you avoid last-minute meltdowns. While it is perfectly okay and understandable to have an emotional storm come out of the blue, it may help you feel more settled if you are able to process the grief more thoroughly.

I recommend creating a goodbye ritual that you adhere to no matter what, such as:

• Handwritten notes tucked into his suitcase or her pillow.

• Each partner keeping a talisman of sorts – a special rock with a word written on it that symbolizes union or strength.

• A certain quote or phrase that infuses hope, strength and connection, that can be spoken to one another at parting, e.g.,“ Our love and connection crosses state lines.”

Being able to keep in touch via cell phone, Skype video calls, and texting can all make weekly goodbyes much less painful. The goal is to keep these connections thriving.